Happy almost-6-am.
Lol. Happy.
I actually...am.
Got woken up at 11AM..yesterday, by my mom.
She dragged me off to some free bbq.
It was fun. The sun was shinning and the air was thick with heat.
Mousey (ugh) and my moms friend Karen came with us.
We ate hot dogs and met the local MLA.
Boring, boring fellow. Couldn't remember his name if
my life depended on it. He did though, wear a yellow shirt.
Beige slacks if I remember that correctly.
Anyway.
We ditched them all at the bbq, and walked on to Janets house.
Haven't seen them in forever.
It was pleasant. Avery was there. Being...Avery-ish.
His sister Tara-Lynn came over later, with their mom.
And uh...yeah. I dont know why I was EVER friends with her.
She's such a bitch. And...mean. Snobby, almost.
Like..she looks down on me. IDK. I kinda think she's jealous.
Of what, I couldn't tell you. It's not like I've got much.

Did I tell you, about how Just Listen made me decide
I shouldn't lie any more? Well. It actually kinda forced me.
Everywhere I went, all I could focus on were the tiny little lies that just sort of..
sprouted. So I stopped. And it's..fun.
I like wanting to tell people what I actually think.
And truth be told, I dont give a fuck what they think about it.

The sun is up. And..I'm probably going to go over to Tany's after I grab a shower.
I'm hungry.
And I know she's got food at her place.
Hm.

Kind of mixed feelings all day long.
Depressing subjects. Like..my dad.
I'm just..so mad at him, for so many things.
And...I dont know when it happened...but..
I started pushing this all away.
I never dwell on him,
I've noticed.
Like right now, it's like..a..
reflex. I just try to move away from it.
Even now, my fingers want me to move on to
something else.
So I will.

Avery is going out with Rachel.
The annoying one, from my gym class.
And on the walk home, for some reason,
My mom started talking about..Mitchel.
Avery's brother. The older one.
The one I had a crush on foreverr.
And I could've sworn he liked me back.
But..I dont know. I tried to tell him so many times and he...
pushed me away. I still kind of..
like him.
I think. A little.
I find that I think about him alot.

Rightnow: listening to 'Daysleeper' by Dear and the Headlights.
Amazing song. They kind of remind me of..wintersleep with this song.
But at the same time, so much more..alive. Fresh.
Less depressing. Um. Yeah.

Wished that I had a camera just about a billion times today.
The view from Dayton's street is..amazing.
Especially in the pale morning light, when all the houses and the streetlights and that were all a glow. And in the hot sun, looking down the road at the river in the distance.
Gah. How beautiful my blog would look with visuals.
I believe this is long enough of a post for one day,
so I leave you here.