I'm moving in with Jenn.
I should be happy, but I can't stop crying.
I don't want to cry.
I don't want this.
I don't want anything.

I have that hollow feeling in my chest,
and it feels like falling.
I'm tired.

Sick of everything.

I need to talk to you.

I don't think things can really be that way again.
I don't know if it's a bad thing, though.

Whatever, man.

I didn't know what you meant at first.
I don't even know how I figured it out,
but I got to thinking about your blogger blog
and what the name of it was.
And I started going to it thinking I was totally crazy
and why wouldn't you just say that you were going back on
there if you were? But then I got on it, because I started reading.

Anyway,
Yeah.
This is really just /our/ place,
I suppose. Because I would never post
anything completely soulful on my tumblr either.
And I would never really want a bunch of people
to see this because there is so much of me.


I'm sorry that you're going through all this stuff and that
I really can't do much to help, or comfort, or...anything.
But I am here for you, which I know you know.
Because I love you, and you're my best friend.
And I just don't think I could ever...not, you know?

I don't know what to tell you about this situation, though.
I really don't. It sucks.
Don't be mad at yourself for not wanting to just be happy.
Sometimes there just..has to be more.
But I don't think you should have to push yourself into anything.
Sometimes it's better just to go forward, I know.
But...I don't want things to end up being...more complicated.
And like, I just want things to be good for you.
I'm just..worried.
I hate to see you hurt.
But...if you are going to.
Then, I'll be supportive of that.
Because it's your choice and...you never know,
it could end up great.
It could be the best thing you ever chose to do.
So, just..yeah.
I'm just here for you.
And..I miss you too.

And I hope we get to talk soon.

Woke up laaaate.

Because I fell back asleeep.

Kinda feel like a sheeep

with all these extraaa

'aaahhhh' sounds.

Haha. I don't even know.

I'm hyper as fuck right now.

And omg.

Clarinet version of About A Girl

by Guy Ripley is completely amazing.

o:

If low energy.

It's so damn classy.

Wrote this last night after I posted the other things. Decided to add it, because I am so lazy to get ready today.

This page was fresh.

It only takes a moment

to destroy

everything.

Years,

Months,

Weeks,

Days,

Hours,

Seconds,

time's up.

Just going to get ready for work.

Tired as fuck.

Didn't wake up well.

Because I decided to sleep in since I had no idea what time

I had to be up (I only slept until 7:45, so.),

but I was all shakey and confused anyway because

I kicked into overdrive panicking that Casey needed

me for 8AM and that was in like...20.

Haha.

I'm pretty much ready now and it is just hitting 8, though.

Which is funny because all I did was throw some clothes on.

Just gotta attack my hair and then pack my bag.

(:

Been listening to acoustic guitar based things a lot.

It's so pretty and strong, I don't know how I

ever find the time to abandon it for electro, etc.

I'm starting to hate anything rule-like.

And I think everything would go better if laws and rules and things were phrased

positively.

("No stopping on the bridge"

vs.

"Please always stay moving on the bridge.")

Dull summer heat,

slap-sharp in it's own right,

fills my pores.

Cells.

Parts.

Everything.

Sticks and clings,

conjures sweat.

Weighty and dangerous,

it almost

soothes,

if it didn't prickle.